Rose has been home a few days now and things have started to fall into a bit of a routine.
Deborah obviously takes care of the breast-feeding side of things and I seem to do most of the nappy changing. We've been doing so well that we've decided to promote each other.
Deborah is now the Chief Milk Technician and I'm the Senior Personal Sanitation Engineer.
I'm amazed how quickly I've adapted to doing a change in the middle of the night, quickly and efficiently but still with my eyes half closed before stumbling back to bed.
We've managed to get out to the park and the shops in the pushchair which is more than I was expecting to be able to do in the first week.
After four days of being in hospital, my new family actually come home.
I'd been kicked out of the hospital at 2000 every evening and not allowed back till 1000 each morning. Home is particularly lonely when your wife and new daughter aren't there.
I was so glad when Deborah called me to say that Rose had finally been given the all-clear and that they could be discharged. I rushed to the hospital, but of course nothing happens very quickly there. It was 1300 before we could finally get out of there and home.
What a relief.
Rose has entered the world, it's just that we can't get her home.
The poor thing is cute as a button and is healthy as hell, just apart from a touch of jaundice. She's not particularly yellow, it just looks like she has a bit of a golden tan.
The upshot of all this is that my new little family have had to stay at the hospital which is becoming a bit of a bummer. Deborah is holding up pretty well considering she's practically in prison.
I'd heard about it beforehand and found it to be true - we just can't stop staring at Rose. She's better than TV.
My favourite thing so far is to have Rose on a pillow on my lap (asleep) with me reading a book. Every time I turn a page or when she makes a gurgle I can look down and see how cute she is. Bliss.
A strange old day and no mistake, but all's well that end's well and it ended very well indeed.
When i arrived first thing in the morning, Deborah was already in a lot of pain having been given the induction drugs the night before. The pain only got worse and more frequent and it was a bit grim as we were on a shared ward. eventually with enough crying out and tears we were given a room and D got an epidural.
There was a slightly amusing moment (in hindsight) when there were around 10 doctors and midwives in the room all watching Deborah scream out for a couple of minutes. They had to uncomfortably wait till D had finished and then they could continue asking their questions.
Deborah soon had the epidural in and things calmed down a lot. In fact for the next 5-6 hours it was all pretty boring. I didn't feel it was appropriate to read a book and there was no radio or music and D was so out of it, there wasn't much conversation.
By 1900 D was only 6-7cm dilated so the doctors suggested upping the induction drugs to speed things along. This worked but also made things more painful so by now Deborah was using so much drugs that she couldn't feel her legs any more.
By 2030 Deborah was fully dilated and it was decided to go for the push. Deborah was trying her hardest to push, but was struggling to feel anything. This bit is clearly the downside of an epidural. After over an hour of pushing and no head, the doctors decided to pull the baby out.
The doc attached a little white suction cup to the babies head and more people appeared in the room. A real sergeant major type midwife turned up and directed everyone, making sure everyone pushed/pulled in time with the contractions. It was an exciting few minutes. The baby was having trouble getting out so the doctor performed an episiotomy to make a bigger exit. This seemed to do the trick - a head emerged and then very quickly the whole body and Rose was born!
The cord was cut and Rose was whisked away and a midwife did the post birth checks that need doing. They briefly gave Rose to Deborah, but she was in a slightly uncomfortable position and being sewn up by the doctors so I got to hold her.
Holding your baby for the first time is a pretty amazing experience and i thought I'd be crying but it didn't work out like that. I'll certainly never forget looking down on this fresh new creature and having these slate grey and beautifully clear eyes looking up, seemingly studying me. I also remember being amazed by how big her hands and particularly feet are. Rose's nails are so long and even then scratched her face a little.
Seeing your own baby being born is a powerful experience and the proud feeling I have in Deborah and Rose is enormous.
Rose was born at 10.55 on 23 May 2008. I got to phone the grandparents and my aunt around midnight and they were of course, delighted and proud.
We eventually got to the maternity ward around 0100 in the morning and
I was sent home shortly afterward.
A long day, but the biggest of my life so far.
Looks increasingly like it'll be the induction tomorrow. A bit of a shame not to have the home birth we planned, but on the other hand the chance of an epidural may be a good thing.
I have a really good feeling, as i have all along, that everything is going to work out OK. I feel that it's probably going to be a difficult day or two, but that we'll have a lovely, healthy baby at the end of it. I do feel a little nervous, but that's because it's just such an unknown for me and completely outside my own experience.
I am very much looking forward to seeing and holding our baby though. I've been imagining it for months and I can't wait now.
It's been a long wait, but now for the big push.
No sign of anything just yet.
We went to the hospital last Friday and booked in an inducement for friday on the off-chance nothing kicks off before then. We're hoping not to have to wait till then of course.
An inducement means going into hospital which isn't ideal, but at least you can get proper drugs there.
The waiting game continues.
The mid-wife thought the little fellas heart beat was a little slow so D and I had to go to the hospital and get it checked out.
Got seen pretty quick and thankfully, everything is fine. We then had to wait another 3 frickin' hours before the doctor could come and see us and let us home! No dinner for us - [sob]....
We were in the top room at the labour ward though - birthing pool, aqua light tube thing and a disco-ball. No expense spared it seems.
The preparations continue. Last weekend I watched an nct video on giving birth. At first I found it quite shocking seeing two women give birth, but it's a mighty powerful thing and I was quite emotional by the end. I also feel a little better armed for our own birth which is the main thing.
Equipment wise, all we've added is several square metres of plastic sheeting. Hmmm.
Since last weekend though, i've basically just been on high alert and waiting. I feel like a soldier waiting to be dropped into enemy territory, but not knowing when the plane will leave. The longer it goes on the more jittery i get, though i'm trying not to show it in front of deborah.
Any day now i'm sure....
Was going to go out last night and watch Ironman with D and my Dad, but i got a call from the missus - 'I'm not feeling that good, can you come home'.
For the first time, i thought, 'my god, this is it!'. I got home as soon as possible and it looks like it was just an upset stomach (is this a sign?).
It's all getting a bit real now.
Watching and waiting.....
Hmmm, had to come up with a birth plan - not as easy as I'd first imagined. There are all sorts of questions on the form, but precious little advice on what the answers should be.
Home or hospital is an easy one - home. After that a lot of the questions are irrelevant as they only apply if your in hospital, such as do you want an epidural?
I think we've muddled through and I'm sure we'll be fine. From what i hear, things almost never go to the 'plan' anyway.
counting the days....
